Mercy triumphs over judgement.
It was a normal weekday evening for the kids and I. We had just pulled into the parking lot at the YMCA when I was approached by a woman who appeared worn down and exhausted. She politely asked me if I had any cash I could spare so that she could get some gas for her car.
See, when you're a parent you always have an audience. My little humans were watching this exchange between the woman and I, and I wanted to do right by God and by my children. The woman went on to explain that she was in poor health and was unable to reach any of her family members by phone to get help. All she needed was a few bucks to fill her tank to make it home.
My response: "I honestly don't have any cash on me, otherwise I would help you! However... why don't I follow you to the gas station and I'll fill your tank?"
Woman: "Um, I could never ask you to do that (shocked look on her face)."
Me: "You didn't ask... I offered. Where are you parked? I'll swing around and follow you to the gas station and use my debit card."
Woman: "I'm in the red car over there (points)."
I get back into the car and drive over to where she is parked. She backs out of her spot and I notice she is driving towards me. She pulls up next to me and motions for me to roll down my window.
What happened next floored me. Absolutely took my breath away...
She says with tears streaming down her cheeks, "M'am, I straight up lied to you. I can't take your money, nor do I need gas. I have a full tank." Without hesitation I respond, "It's okay. Guess what? I love Jesus and I really think He's chasing you down with His love today." She begins to cry harder and says that today was the first time she had prayed in a long time. She is apologizing over and over, the guilt apparent in her face. I felt such compassion and even admiration for her repentant heart. I looked deeply into her eyes and said the words: "I forgive you."
As she drove away the skies opened up and a torrential rain pours down and into my open car window. I'm crying by this point, thanking God in prayer for that precious moment He gifted me with.
See, I've been struggling to forgive myself, to let God's grace penetrate my weathered heart. Forgiveness was the "word of the day" on that ordinary Monday. Mercy triumphs over judgement. Everytime. When God's grace reaches a heart, darkness and shame run for the hills.
So why retell this story? Is it to put myself on display? To tell you just how awesome I am? NO. I tell this story because my faith came to vibrant life that evening through that random (maybe not random at all!) moment.
It really is so much better to give than to receive. I walked away with a full heart and she drove away with an already full tank of gas... and a clean conscience.
